The secret to creating elegant habits

Hello beautiful. Welcome to the blog. My name is Victoria and I teach women how to create an elegant life and become the highest version of themselves. Today I’m sharing exactly how to create elegant habits by rewiring your brain.

elegant habits

Perhaps one of the most difficult tasks you will face on your elegance journey is that of breaking old habits, and creating new elegant habits.

Up until this point in your life (if you are anything like I was when I started this journey), you probably have picked up a lot of less than classy habits. Sometimes it is difficult to admit that you have a lot of bad habits or even identify which habits are bad.

The truth is that your entire life is essentially based on your habits. If you work a regular job and have a routine for your life, you are living a life of habit. You are living on auto pilot.

If you have great habits, this might be wonderful for you.

If you are trying to make positive changes in your life, then it’s time to evaluate and change your habits accordingly.

In this post we are going to take a deep dive into your habits. I’m going to talk about the Habit loop, which is something that I learned about last year and It’s helped me tremendously when it came to ditching bad habits. I’ll also be sharing some tips on how to create new habits.

elegant habits

Step 1. Identify your not-so elegant habits

When was the last time you actually put thought into your habits? When you are in the middle of a bad habit, do you think to yourself I really need to quit this.

If you’ve never put much thought into your habits then this exercise might take some time for you to do. Initially I was aware of some habits that I wanted to change, but once I decided that I wanted to start looking for bad habits, my mind automatically would start pointing them out to me as I was doing them. I would make a note in my phone about said habits, then analyze everything at a later date.

The easiest thing to do is start by identifying one bad habit. Here are some habits that are extremely common. Can you relate?

  • Scrolling on your phone for too long
  • Poor eating habits
  • Procrastination
  • Not getting enough sleep
  • Being disorganized

Once you’ve identified one bad habit you would like to change, it’s time to move to step 2: using the habit loop to analyze this habit.

Step 2: Use the habit loop

I recently read a book last year called The Power of Habit by Charles Duhigg. In the book, Duhigg introduces the habit loop.

The habit loop is a neurological loop that controls your habits.

The habit loop consists of 3 key parts:

  • The Cue: Anything that triggers the habit. Cues generally a time of day, a location, an emotional state
  • The routine: The routine is the habitual behavior that results from the cue.
  • The reward: The benefits that you receive from the routine. This can be dopamine, or stress relief, etc.

Let’s break down one of my bad habits that I’m currently working on breaking: Scrolling too much in the morning when I wake up.

The cue: I wake up, needing to see what time it is. I check my phone because I don’t have a clock in my room.

The routine: I check the time, and then I begin checking social media, mail, etc. This leads me to begin scrolling and wasting time on my phone. Before I know it, It’s been an hour or more.

The reward: Scrolling on social media gives me *cheap* dopamine.

Here are a few things that I plan to do to try and break this habit.

  • Get a clock in my room so I don’t need to use my phone to check the time.
  • Sleep with my phone outside of my room so I don’t reach for it as soon as I wake up.
  • Leave my journal by my bed and my yoga mat out so I will be more likely to journal or do stretches before grabbing my phone.

Step 3: Break your bad habits one by one

Now that you’ve been able to see an example of what it looks like to identify, analyze and create a plan to break your bad habits, it’s time to start working on breaking your habits one by one.

I wouldn’t recommend trying to break multiple habits at a time. You’ve most likely had these habits for a while, and you need to give yourself adequate time to break them for good.

This is where it helps to have a journal or document on your computer so that you can write down your habits and use the habit loop to analyze them.

Step 4: Create elegant habits

You’ve made it to the fun part! Transforming into an elegant version of yourself is building a new lifestyle piece by piece. Your habits are a huge part of this transformation.

You get to choose any habits that you want to create that will get you closer to the life that you want to live.

If you want to have an elegant body, then you might want to start better eating habits and workout habits. If you want to have better self esteem, you might want to start some self care and self love habits that you do throughout the day.

You can create a new habit by writing the habit you want to create, then writing out a habit loop for it, you get to decide the cue and the reward.

Step 5: Create new rewards

In order to successfully create new habits, you must create new rewards. You perform a habit typically because there is some kind of reward for you at the end.

This is where you can get creative with your rewards. If you have a fitness goal your reward can be a new outfit every couple of weeks to celebrate your progress.

Your rewards can be big or small.

I use a habit app for my rewards. I can log when I complete a new habit, and when I complete the habit for a certain number of days in a row, I reward myself with a manicure or something that I’ve been eying for a long time.

Bonus tip: Habit stacking

Habit stacking is when you take a habit that you are already doing and adding something in addition to that habit.

Here’s an example: You want to become more intelligent this year, and you already spend a lot of time time on social media which is a habit many people have.

You can habit stack by following a few social media pages of things you want to learn about. Science, psychology, fashion, anything.

So whenever you are in the habit of being on social media, you will come across some content that will help you become more intelligent and learn new things.

Elegant habits, elegant life.

It will take a lot of work, and sometimes you might find that a certain new habit you are trying to create isn’t working out very well. In this case, you might have to make some tweaks to make it work better for your lifestyle.

No matter the problem, keep working on changing your habits. They weren’t created in a day, so they will take a while to break and replace.

You can do this!

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1 Comment

  1. Tammy
    January 26, 2023 / 9:44 pm

    I have my work cut out. I have 4 out of the 5 I think I’ll work on the first one and I think I can do a few others also. I really liked this article.

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