I’m getting real about elegance today. I think it is important for me to speak more openly about the problems that you will have when you start taking steps towards becoming an elegant woman.
When I first started, I knew my life would change. Some things I was expecting, and some things I wish I was more prepared for.
Women who teach elegance online will tell you about the benefits of elegance, as I do. But today I’m going to share with you some of the problems you will face when you level up.
Why will you have problems when you become classy?
Becoming a classy lady ultimately means you are changing every single area of your life. You are letting go of your old self in order to become a better version of you.
It’s a beautiful transformation and a very eye opening experience, but it comes with drawbacks that are rarely discussed.
The people around you will notice you change, you might have to make life shifts that will take you far beyond you comfort zone, and you have to learn to do hard things.
Here are 5 classy girl problems you must learn about before becoming a classy woman. If you’ve already begun your elegance journey, these are problems you might already be facing.
1.You have to face your past so you can heal.
Elegance isn’t just about the way you dress and having etiquette. Elegance is about being a happy, healthy, beautiful woman inside and out.
Even thought it seems like being classy is mostly superficial, the version of elegance I teach is multi dimensional and involves a lot of self healing.
With that being said, you cannot properly level up your life if you have skeletons in your closet. Life is hard and we all have some sort of trauma that we have faced.
Whether you had a rough childhood and have trauma, or you faced hardships in your adult life that you haven’t fully recovered from, you must heal before you can truly become a next-level version of you.
You cannot bring the trauma and pain from your old life into this new life.
Healing from your problems means you can clear all of the toxic, negative energy out of your life and make room for new energy.
This means though that you will have to come face to face with the darkest parts of you. The parts of you that you’ve tried to run from for all this time.
It can be painful and difficult. But it needs to happen.
2.You will lose friends
I know this is hard to hear, but not everyone is your friend. I’m sure you have a couple of good friends, maybe some best friends, and then people that you work with.
When you start taking active steps to level up, you will lose some friends. It’s inevitable. There are many reasons why your inner circle will change during your elegance journey, so I’ll do my best to name a few.
- Your interests will change: You will change the music you listen to, you will start new hobbies, you will find new activities you’ve never tried. You might stop going to bars or other low quality places that your friends still enjoy. You will naturally take on different interests than your friends and slowly you will begin to disconnect.
- You will learn to stop being a people pleaser, and your friends will be upset when you start saying ‘no’ more often.
- Your friends will accuse you of ‘acting like you’re better than them‘ when you try to dress better and do more high quality things. This is jealousy mixed with a little bit of uncertainty because they aren’t sure where they fit in your life anymore. They will try to make you feel guilty about leveling up.
- You will have to remove certain people from your life because you will realize that they are actually toxic for you and are only hindering you from becoming classy.
Ultimately when you are trying to improve your life you will naturally begin to grow apart from the people who are not ready to better themselves. Everyone moves at their own pace in life and sometimes they just need their own time.
3.Boundaries & high standards will upset people
One of the best ways to make improvements to your life is to set boundaries and raise your standards. I like to think of boundaries as rules that people must follow in order to be a part of your life.
You will naturally begin to raise your standards when you are becoming elegant, and some of your friends won’t make the cut. This will cause tension because you will have to reduce the time that you spend with them and they will grow increasingly resentful of you.
Unfortunately this happens, and it’s a normal part of the elegance journey.
4. You will have to part ways with family
It’s difficult to lose friends…it’s even more difficult to lose family. Even though you might be related by blood or marriage, just because someone is your family doesn’t mean they deserve to have access to you.
Some family members are extremely toxic and we are more forgiving of them simply because they are family.
I teach my clients that a toxic person is a toxic person, period. It doesn’t matter if you are related to them or not. You will have to stand up to your family members, set boundaries with them and even stop talking to them altogether.
If they are standing in the way of your happiness in any capacity, they don’t deserve to be in your life. Even if they are your family.
5. Changing your habits is very difficult and takes hard work.
One of the biggest issues I faced when leveling up my life was changing my habits. Nearly all of the habits I struggled with were habits of low quality people. I lived my life on a very low vibrational frequency.
My habits were terrible and I thought it was okay to live my life that way. When I wanted to change my habits, it took me a long time and a lot of discipline.
I still don’t have the habits that I feel I should have, sometimes some months are better than others in terms of my habits and how much improvement I’m making.
Becoming more elegant is the best thing you could do for yourself, but it can become rather difficult at times when you face your past and start evolving around your friends and family. People will become jealous and have negative things to say, and that only shows the kind of person that they are.
Nothing and no one should hold you back from becoming elegant if that is what you truly want, but there can be some guilt involved because you must set boundaries with loved ones and stay firm.
Are you ready to become an elegant woman?
- 20+ Etiquette rules all elegant women should know.
- How to dress like an elegant woman.
- Elegant tips I’ve learned from the Royal Family.
- How to command attention in a classy way.
- H x ow to be elegant in a toxic situation.
- 50 Ways to be elegant each day.
- 7 ways to boost your intelligence.
- 5 ways to be more sophisticated
- Hobbies elegant women have
- 10 ways to look polished every day
- How to be graceful like a Princess
- …and more!