Hello beautiful! My name is Victoria and I teach women just like you how to become an elegant, classy woman. Today I want to tell you about the 10 things classy women don’t do.
Over the past couple of years I’ve been on the most beautiful elegance journey and I have learned and grown so much as a person. But recently I learned that there are many things that classy women don’t do, and it sets them apart from other women.
These things may not seem like a big deal, but there is a noticeable difference in the appearance and behavior of high value women compared to other women.
High value women want to be respected, remembered, valued, and treated with kindness. In order to be treated the way they wish, they act in a way that attracts people who are going to respect them. There are just certain things that classy women don’t do.
A few things to remember:
You can do some of these things and still be an elegant woman. I’m not saying that some of the things I’m about to list are bad, and that you shouldn’t ever do them, but I am saying that these are the characteristics and qualities that are similar amongst classy, high value women.
Elegance is a journey
You don’t transform into the highest version of yourself overnight. Doing any kind of life transformation takes time, patience, and constant daily effort to break habits, reprogram the mind, and create a new version of yourself.
Some of these things are hard to let go. And I will mention these when I get to them, but one of my biggest struggles when I stopped doing some of these things was that I genuinely like them and I felt like I was leaving a part of who I was behind. Sometimes I still feel that way.
But I continue to remind myself that I want to leave the old me behind. I’m becoming a new person, a better version of myself. And sometimes that means leaving some things in the past.
Here are things that classy women never do.
Engage in arguments and drama both online and offline
There is so much negativity in the world. You can’t say anything online without getting a rude comment, and sometimes the people in your own life can be toxic.
But elegant women do not waste time arguing with people. I talk about this in a module in my course about staying calm in heated situations, but there are miserable people in the world who want to bring everybody down to their level.
Elegant women don’t ever get down on that level. They know how to control their temper, they understand that their energy and their peace is valuable so they do not engage in arguments or drama of any kind. They simply excuse themselves from the situation.
Change their hair color all the time, wear unnatural colors in their hair.
This one might be triggering to some. Let me be clear, I am the first person to tell you that Justine Skye’s purple hair is absolutely beautiful and that there is such a thing as unnatural colors done right,
but I must say that when I studied elegant women and the British royals, I noticed that they normally stick with their natural hair color, or other colors that look natural with their skin tone.
High value women don’t change their hair color all the time, and they do not color their hair with unnatural colors like purple, blue, etc.
Be disrespectful to waiters, waitresses, or anyone else.
One of the biggest things that frustrate me about non-classy women is how rude they can be.
I worked in retail and I worked in the restaurant business. I’ve seen angry customers, I’ve seen people be disrespectful to the very people who are providing them service, and I learned that any woman who would treat someone poorly is not a high value woman.
Additionally, elegant women don’t leave small tips. Whenever receiving a service, classy women budget for a gracious tip.
This leaves a good impression and if it’s a place that you will be frequenting, it will make the staff happy to see you every time you visit because of how lovely and gracious you are.
Classy women don’t show too much skin
I have a feeling that this is going to be controversial, but I’m sorry, I’m doubling down on this. A common rule when it comes to women who want to be desirable but still look elegant is to only show off one part of your body at a time.
If you want to show off your legs, wear a conservative top. If you want to flaunt your cleavage, wear a conservative bottom.
And perhaps my favorite tips when it comes to being classy- never have your bum hanging out of your shorts! Your shorts should cover everything you have going on back there. Trust me, you attract the wrong kind of people when you expose yourself.
Classy women don’t get unnaturally long nails.
Another controversial one. I’m going to preface this by saying that nails are a form of art and some long nails are beautiful pieces of art, but it doesn’t mean they are classy.
Classy women avoid extremely long nails and prefer a more natural look. They also avoid bright, bold colors on their nails for French tips or ombré dip.
Here’s how I used to wear my nails.
I think that color blue (OPI Loyalty to Royalty) is an absolutely beautiful color, but looking at these nails now makes me cringe. The color looks tacky and it does not look elegant at all.
It was my first time getting nails that shape and I wanted to do something bold. They are pretty, but I wouldn’t describe them as classy. And I don’t think anyone else would either.
Choosing nails that are natural looking and not too long will make you look more classy and expensive. If you are a color lover like myself, it might be hard to stop putting color on your nails.
Remember, there is nothing wrong with changing as a person. You aren’t losing yourself just because of your nails.
Classy women don’t compare themselves to others.
With everyone having access to everyone’s highlight reels online, it is very easy to compare yourself to other women online.
True elegant women focus on their own journey. Not the journeys of other people. They know that they are only in competition with themselves.
Classy Women don’t share too many details of their lives.
Once I was at the jewelry store looking for pieces of jewelry for my daughters. I needed some assistance viewing one of the pieces so an associate had to come and remove it from behind the glass case.
Instead of trying to sell me the jewelry, she was talking to me about how her stomach was hurting but she wasn’t sure if she was pregnant or now. I was absolutely shocked. Not only was this extremely not classy, but it was unprofessional as well.
I’d never seen that woman in my entire life. Why was she telling me all of these intimate and personal details about her life?
Learn how to not overshare details of your personal life with others. Especially with people you don’t know. Elegant women have a mystery about them that is absolutely dazzling.
Classy women don’t wear pajamas in public.
I know for some people think that this is a no brainer, but you would be surprised how many people I see walking arung the supermarket in their pajamas.
To be fair, I used to do too. I remember once when I was 18 going to ihop for food with my full on pajamas. I also used to go to the grocery store and just out for quick errands in my pajamas. So cringe.
You don’t have to get all dolled up just to go to the grocery store, but you should put some time and effort into your appearance.
Elegant ladies never upload scantily clad photos to social media.
Have you been on social media lately? There are a lot of women who don’t mind baring it all for the ‘gram. But I’m here to tell you that you don’t have to post nearly nude photos of yourself to get attention online.
Being a classy woman goes beyond how you present yourself in the real world. It’s important to maintain your elegance and class online as well.
Almost every company or person I have talked to has said that they look up their applicants and check out their social profiles when considering hiring them. If you wouldn’t want your grandmother to see the photos, it’s not appropriate for posting online.
Classy women don’t curse like a sailor
Again. This one might be controversial. Elegant ladies do not need to use excessively foul language to get their point across. It’s another thing that sets them apart from other women.
Have you unlocked all of the secrets of modern elegance yet?
Take your life to the next level by joining my signature course, Modern Elegance, Simplified.
Learn all the skills necessary to become the classiest woman in the room.
- 20+ Etiquette rules all elegant women should know.
- How to dress like an elegant woman.
- Elegant tips I’ve learned from the Royal Family.
- How to command attention in a classy way.
- How to be elegant in a toxic situation.
- 50 Ways to be elegant each day.
- 7 ways to boost your intelligence.
- 5 ways to be more sophisticated
- Hobbies elegant women have
- 10 ways to look polished every day
- How to be graceful like a Princess
- …and more!
Thank you so much for all these tips. Love them all.. ❤
Beautiful read. It challenged me to get out of my comfort zone and see where I can change.
Very beautiful statements every women needs to read or hear
You are beautiful ! And I just want to say thank you for this lovely message on being a classy lady something I inspire to continue to be . I hope this message will be taken to heart by many women out here young and old and not to be offended if you are doing things that are not lady-like but will take a good look in the mirror and be honest with yourself.
I work with many women who study me all day and tell me they admire me but I tell them I had to look into the mirror also.
Thank you for all These insites! It’s Appreciated.However I do Disagree with Beautiful color on Nails.Look at Paloma on Instagram,one of the most Elegant,Classy Models & her husband!One of my favorite photos of her was with Bright Red Nails,a signiture she copied from her mom.Coco Chanel did the same,Nails & Lipstick….However,the rest of your attire should complete your look!
Blessings from South Africa ??❤️??A Classy,Elegant woman.
Patricia! Great Point! I suppose I should have specified. I think red is beautiful and I would get red on my nails but I wouldn’t get the royal blue, purple, or colors like that. It’s just my personal preference. Thanks for reading!
You welcome….shared information is great improvement in all our lives!
I was a Fashion Designer, Wardrobe Organizer for many decades!
Dressed Miss World, Miss Universe & Miss Switzerland!
Blessings to you & hugs from South Africa ???
Thank you for your great notes on the topic I love!
I work with young girls and would love to teach them how to be Classy Ladies!
My mother was not educated bit she was a classy lady I must say. We where taught the old fashion way of how to be ladies and the classy part will be a great help to the new generation.
Thank you again for this wonderful blog.
From a Lady in South Africa!
I would have added that they don’t wear tattoos. If I missed that one sorry, but to me that and multiple piercings are just gaudy.
I agree with this. I have 2 tattoos and I hate them so much I wish I never got them and I want to get them removed.
Lovely read. I agree with all of these. I would append that having tailored wardrobe pieces are a must! On the other hand, I would like to add that I have a full body traditional black and grey Japanese body suit tattoo. It’s the most elegant piece I own. ☺️